Identification with Thought

What it is, and what it isn't.

In regards to the spiritual seeking journey it is often mentioned that we "identify with thought." Not only is the phrase thrown around frequently, but all too often it’s thrown around haphazardly. Many teachers seem to be deeply confused about this topic. What follows is my attempt to put a (much) finer point on the idea. This is a companion essay to the one I titled “Stages of Identification” (found here). Although the themes contained in each are closely interrelated, it’s simpler to present the ideas in individual essays. Some of the body text is copied between these essays in case someone reads just one. Apologies for the repetition to those that read both.

It’s worth noting at the outset that “identification” is a natural activity of the conceptual thinking mind. Regardless of one’s degree of “realization” there will be some manner of identification that takes place. The fully-realized individual has a sense of identity just as anyone does. But someone in that position has a light and flexible sense of identity compared to those still seeking (or who have not even started seeking yet). In essence the realized yogi has a sense of identity, but knows it’s not “fundamentally true.”

Also it’s important to note that, while I reference the following “stages” in sequential order, that should not be taken too literally. It’s quite possible that early in the seeking journey one can start trying to untangle the riddle of the last stage. If one attempts that and actually pulls it off (which is very much possible!), there’s a very good chance that clearing up all of the confusion found in the earlier-numbered stages will be much, much, much easier than slogging one’s way through the “sequential” approach. Again the “sequence” just so happened to be how it played out for me, but that doesn’t mean it’s a “correct” approach. Both work! But the former (“jumping to the end” approach) can be much simpler and easier in practice. However the “sequential” path is conceptually simpler, so I’ve decided to write about it that way.

First Stage

Before one begins the seeking journey, and for a (hopefully) short while after, it’s accurate enough to say we “identify with thought.” The “anchor” (that is the foundational sense) of identity is thought itself. Thought in general seems to define one’s reality; if you think it, then that’s the way things are.

But with a modicum of mindfulness meditation practice (and/or perhaps some therapy) it's normal for a person to gain some "distance" from thought. One begins to see thoughts as merely thoughts. You will often hear the phrase “you are not your thoughts¹.” When this process “sinks in” fully one will enter the second stage of the journey. From this point on a person will no longer “identify with thought” in general.

Second Stage

In this second stage of the journey the anchor of identification moves from thinking-in-general to the mental self-image in particular. This is root of the famous "illusion of the self." We have a mental self-image², and we mistakenly believe that our self-image is what we are. One also has this erroneous belief in the previous stage, but at that point one is additionally bamboozled by thinking in general.

This is a fine point here that many teachers aren’t aware of or gloss over. At this second stage the yogi/seeker cannot and does not identify with though in general. The only thoughts the seeker will identify with are those comprising the self-image.

Unfortunately most teachers make the erroneous assumption that the presence of "selfing thoughts" means you are identified with them. That is completely untrue. Those "selfing thoughts" just arise like any thoughts just arise. Selfing thoughts are simply habituated. They continue to arise at every stage of the journey, even after “complete realization³.” Just because they arise doesn't mean they're true. Just because they arise doesn't mean we should automatically trust or believe them.

In the first two stages of the journey we do automatically believe the selfing thoughts; that belief is what comprises our identification with them. So in these early stages it can be helpful to have a reminder about how to deal with them: simply treat them the same way as any other thoughts are treated in mindfulness.

Notice them for what they are: mere thoughts. Don’t push them away and don’t let them draw you in. Simply notice them as thoughts and just watch them. They'll eventually go away like all thoughts do. A fundamental property of thought is evanescence.

Once one completely understands that the self-image is comprised of nothing other than thoughts — which are evanescent and utterly insubstantial — then one can “break the spell” of identifying with the mental self-image. This can occur definitively; one can “see through the illusion of the self” once and for all. When this happens one enters the third stage of the journey.

Third Stage

This third stage probably the longest and hardest stage for most people. Most practitioners — sadly, the vast majorities of teachers — go to their graves without moving past this stage.

Again the fine point is needed… contrary to what most teachers say it is impossible for you to “identify with thought” in general at this stage. You no longer will even identify with your “normal” mental self-image (which is made of nothing other than thoughts). There is one — and only one — thought that you identify with at this point. It is what Ramana Maharshi referred to as “The I-Thought.”

It is the most subtle and most difficult thought to get to the bottom of. It is the belief that you are what you think you are. As I discussed in my warnings against pursuing awakening (found here), all beliefs at their core are a concept. And all concepts fall short of reality. To realize what the “Fundamental Nature” is, that is concomitant with realizing the ultimate limitations of concepts. That means full realization is the end of all belief.⁴ To realize the Fundamental you must let go of the belief that you know what you are.

There is a dangerous seduction at this point in the journey. Most people start out on the journey because they feel there is something “wrong” with them… They lack something, they suffer… At this third stage of the journey you realize that that little “suffering you” is not what you are. So if you are not that, then what are you⁵?

This is the dangerous seduction: you are now free to believe that you are one of any number of lofty, spiritually-potent conceptions: God, Oneness, Brahman, Emptiness, Love, The Universe… these concepts exist for a reason. They are interesting ways to talk about Ultimate Reality. But they are all just concepts; that is they are partial, limited descriptions. They cannot express the full Truth of that-which-is. That partial truth is what makes them seductive.

But where the Ultimate Reality is concerned, failing to capture the whole Truth is the same thing as being outright false. So when one clings to and identifies with one of these lofty concepts one is in (sweet, seductive) delusion. One believes a mere concept is true, and one believes that they are it.

Both beliefs are false.

Fourth Stage

At some point it is possible to definitively realize the utter finitude of the conceptual thinking mind versus the literal infinity of reality. When this happens you can no longer durably identify with any thoughts at all. This is not the same as “full realization.” Although it’s possible for someone to cross this threshold and then jump straight into full realization. But it’s also possible to get stuck in “limbo.” To forever fall out of the spell of “hard” identification with specific concepts, but to also be completely flummoxed as to what one really is. What “reality” really is. I spent many years there.

If one is in this “limbo” stage, the good news is there’s far less suffering than there was before. And further good news, there’s only one stage left. Once one is free of delusion - no longer believing oneself to be what they are not - all that remains is to answer that last question: What are you?

Fifth Stage

And there is more good news here! You already are what you are. Is that so surprising? Since you already are what you are, you don’t have to do anything! Hopefully you will find a friendly soul that will keep pointing you back to the obviousness of your being. You are. How do you know? Because you first have to be before anything can appear at all! If anything appears you already have to be there for it to appear to. Before anything can be known (and you know you are experiencing already), there must already be that-which-knows.

Your experience — totally normal, just as it is! — is already appearing. What is it that “knows” experience is there? It’s the same “it” that knows when it’s not there⁶. But that “it” is not an “it.” It’s no-thing at all! It is the “light” behind awareness. It’s SO fundamental, it’s activity SO obvious, that that is why we overlook it for so long.

If one just looks at the very nature of their direct experience, this light cannot be missed. It simply doesn’t get recognized for what it is. It’s you. Your Fundamental Nature. It is possible for this last piece of the puzzle to click into place. When it does, then you will know why it’s called Freedom, Liberation, Nirvana, Release…

Even though we journey for a lifetime, in the end we find out that The Answer is the “Home we never left.”

1. This is not as nuanced a view as is needed later in the journey. But it can be very helpful and “kick” a beginner out of the “ruts” of thinking in the early parts of the path. Eventually one will reach a more nuanced view: your thoughts are a part of you, and often an important part! But only a part. Your thoughts cannot define you. They cannot constrain your being; your Fundamental Nature.

2. This self image is comprised of our personal history, our identity, our social roles, etc. In early stages things like proclivities, preferences, personality, and goals may seem to be part of the self-image. In essence they can be subsumed or co-opted by the self image. But they exist apart from the self-image. Once the illusion of self is seen through definitively, proclivities, preferences, personalities, and goals will still exist, although they may concordantly change.

The self image is the only thing that could be reasonably referred to as “ego.” There is no ego apart from this that can exist. And the self-image (aka ego) has no motivations, it makes no decisions, it can’t carry out actions, it can’t think and it can’t feel or experience anything. Therefore it doesn’t fit most people’s notion of “ego” and so I’m inclined to just say “There’s no such thing as an ego.” The “ego” most people think of when they hear the word “ego” (which will have some tenuous connection to Freud’s out-to-lunch hypotheses) is an utter fantasy like the Tooth Fairy or Santa Claus.

3. This is not necessarily true, just the most common endgame. I have selfing thoughts the same as anyone. I just know they’re not fundamentally true, so I don’t give them unnecessary credence.

However, people like Gary Weber do report all selfing thoughts cease at some point. These reports come from people with tens of thousands of hours of concentration-based meditation practice. My hypothesis is, via neuroplasticity, they have de-habituated the selfing processes in the brain (which the Default Mode Network appears to play a key role in). So let there be no doubt: it IS entirely possible to quiet the monkey mind! If one wants to put in the time and effort, that is.

But regardless of that effort, it’s entirely possible to come to understand the Fundamental Nature without altering the monkey mind one little bit. The “quiet mind” is a part of the spiritual journey one can “season to taste.” It’s nice to have; I’ve experienced it many times. But to make it more-or-less permanent takes a tremendous amount of work. You will have to find the right balance for you.

4. Fun tidbit here… how can you tell if a teacher is not fully realized? It’s easy! Do they seriously advocate for any particular concept at all? If they do, they haven’t “got it” yet. Conceptual hang-ups are red flags. Any teacher truly clinging to any concept has not yet gotten to the bottom of things. Caveat emptor.

5. This question is the entire point of Ramana Maharshi’s advocacy of Self-Inquiry. This is the most fundamental question one can ever ask. It is the most important question; everything hinges on it. When you find the answer, you have found The Answer.

6. Were you conscious while in deep sleep last night? Of course you weren’t! Do you know you were not conscious? Of course you do! So what is it that “knows” that? What is it that can tell the difference? That is the Fundamental Nature at work! Yes, it really is that simple and that obvious! Look into your experience directly - test this notion!